Webhamster Henry's Top 10 Imaginary Sound Events of 2018

Before getting to the imaginary stuff, I'd like to point out the most extraordinary non-imaginary sound performance of 2018: Parkland Student Emma Gonzales' speech at the "March For Our Lives", audible here.

  1. The Happy Twitterer The Prunt Project (Prunted Records 2018)
    The Prunt Project collective has a musical and political objective to translate the annoying flood of presidential tweets into positive messages. As part of the transformation, they are set to cheery music you can dance to.
  2. Termite Mound Sounds Termitology (Subterranean 2018)
    Termite mounds are actually the junk heaps of dirt the industrious bugs haul out of the ground while digging their cities. Millions of tiny legs and feelers are involved, and movement makes sound. Termites make a tapping noise when agitated, so out intrepid researchers at Termitology agitated some termites to come up with these rhythm tracks.
  3. The Gig Gig The Uberchestra (2018)
    The Gig economy is now evolving from bringing in players to sight read a part down to individual lines in a piece. "Why pay for rests?" is their rationale.
    Well there's an app for that!
    The Uberchestra is for hire - they aren't even an orchestra, they just send out a call for a conductor and all the musicians needed for the piece, and the players only last as long as they are needed. The classic joke of the triangle player walking in for one hit is now a reality for all the musicians.
  4. tiniest music bellz
    Bella Kline is a jeweler who makes microscopic bells and flutes out of silver. Working with a microscope, the tiny bells and clappers are crafted with pitches so high you can only hear the interference of their frequencies. The tiny whistles and ocarinas play only one note, and are played with eyedroppers.
  5. Back of My Head Punk Lives Festival! ( 2018)
    Headbangin' music has been around for years, but now comes this percussion ensemble that stands before a rank of tuned drums and basses playing famous punk classics with the backs of their heads.
  6. We Came First The Shells (Eggmouth 2018)
    A chamber group playing only ocarinas made of eggshells, piccolo (hummingbird) to bass (Ostrich).
  7. The White Noise Album The Messy Beat (One of a kind 2018)
    This was a special year for Beatle Fans: 50th anniversaries of "The Beatles" a/k/a the white album. A super box set of all the bits and pieces of that album was released to great acclaim. But this is not that album. This is a copy of the two disks of the white album with their sides filed down so that the grooves can barely guide a needle. Playing the disks causes random noisy jumps - with familiar music leaking through - occasionally resetting it to an earlier track. Best played on two turntables.
  8. Maskpieces Fresh Faces (Product 2018)
    Wildfires in California this year not only destroyed communities but also filled the air with particulates. People who ventured outside were best protected by face masks. But what of brass and wind instrument players? For them, special masks with integrated fipples and mouthpieces were made by Fresh Faces, so they could inhale safely!
  9. Tea Time Afternoon Ritual (Brit Squeak 2018)
    Tea Kettle whistles always have and urgent, pathetic quality to them. Here is a tea kettle octet, with carefully tuned whistles, some tricked out with extra resonators and reeds. Waving about a small crème brûlée sized blowtorch, each kettle is brought into the mix.
  10. AI Carrumba Mexibots (Y Tu Robot Tambien 2018)
    So, what would the perfect Mariachi band sound like? 5,000 recordings fed to a machine learning server now can generate background music suitable for a Chipotle or somewhere, any length, and guaranteed to have the word "corazón" in it somewhere. The similar "Botso Nova" radio bot streams you genereated saudade 24/7.